12.17.2011

I think I found the Christmas spirit...

This year has been, to put it lightly, tough. I'll be more than glad when it's over.

Yet, in the last couple weeks I have found the true Christmas spirit I think.

Snowmen that Levi and Vivian made in school this year... May just be my favorite part of this year, I love these!


In fact, Levi showed me how much of a difference a couple of things has made just the other day:

"lots of people care about us mom, and that's what matters." This, from my very insightful 8 year old little boy. The events that brought on this thought happened in the last few weeks. First, last month a friend at work gave Levi a bike that his child had outgrown becuase Levi had outgrown his, then a secret Santa-friend got me a pair of boots for work. And finally, a friend that I have worked with for a long time gave us a Christmas Tree from his tree farm that up until this year I hadn't even known he owned! To me these seemingly small occurences made a huge difference, as, it seems, they did to the kids...

Since becoming a single-mom household, stress has been the norm for me. These stressors I try and keep quiet about, especially with Megan; at 17 and in her senior year she is very sensitive to stress and money concerns. Most days I feel like I work and try and try to catch up, but there is just no end, like the light at the end of the tunnel is so far away that I would do better to keep digging and get out that way instead of trying to climb out, you know? I catch up on one thing, and another is lurking around the corner, just out of sight until I think I can breath a sigh of relief, and there it is to steal that breath...

Yet, in the last few weeks, as I have talked with the kids about how tight money is, and how the importance of Christmas is family, being together, and being thankful for even the smallest of things. The kids took these talks to heart, and I am so impressed by their understanding of it. Levi said that they have enough toys and don't need any. He did ask for clothes for Christmas, specifically a hoody sweatshirt, Vivian isn't concerned about what she gets other than a doll. Megan says she doesn't need anything, she plans on putting away whatever Christmas money she gets so she can buy a car. Matt, of course, never asks for anytthing, and I know that the gift he is planning on for his brother and sisters will make him this years' Christmas hero!


I thank God that I am one of those early shoppers. Since I start my Christmas gift planning in January, there were gifts to pull out of hiding and place under the tree. It will not be the big Christmas morning that the kids had become accustomed to, but we will be together and happy! 

But even moreso, I thank God for the kindess of others, because in this my kids are so sure that even in the unceartainty of the divorce and all that comes with it, they'll be okay. That God will take care of us and our needs. That ...

"lots of people care about us mom, and that's what matters."

Christmas will never be what it was for me before 2003, I doubt I will ever have the same passion for the season and the joy, but my heart is warmed by the beauty in the thoughts of others this year, and their help in showing my kids what the Christmas spirit is...


Erika
© erikalandon 2011

2 comments:

Amy said...

That is how you know you are doing a job raising kids, when you tell them there's not a lot of money for presents and they're like eh, whatever.

Erika @ SurvivingTriplets.com said...

I agree... It was such a proud mommy moment when I heard that.

I am so thankful for these kids, they are all amazing. I'd give them anything in this world; but I know I don't have to!